Last year, it was easy to miss the start of the school year. It just felt like a suspiciously long summer vacation. But this year, I’m acutely aware that school is happening, and I’m not going back! It’s both weird and liberating to think about. This time five years ago, I was freaking out about leaving for my freshman year of college.
In hindsight, there are a few things I could have done that first week on campus to make things easier on myself. I’ve written about your first week before – a first week of college checklist – but you can never be too prepared. After chatting with a few of my still-in-college friends to make sure everything I’ve mentioned is still relevant, here are some simple “do” and “don’t” rules to help you navigate the first week of your freshman year.
Meeting New People
Do meet as many people as possible. If you don’t get social now, it’ll be harder to break the ice later. People tend to form loose groups in the first few weeks, and if you miss that stage, it can be hard to catch up. (That said, it’s never truly too late!) Talk to people in your dorm, in your classes, and around campus. This is especially easy to do at freshman-centric events.
Don’t focus on the past. A little reminiscing doesn’t hurt. But listening to someone talk about their varsity volleyball team for 25 minutes isn’t a great way to get to know them. Focus on the present and future, not the past! (And don’t try to convince everyone you were the smartest/coolest/prettiest in high school. Everyone’s here for a fresh start! You’ll just look stuck up!)
Easy conversation starters include:
- Majors
- Classes people are most looking forward to
- Classes people are dreading
- Best places people have found to eat around campus
- Extracurriculars people are excited about joining.
Do introduce yourself to your neighbors and floormates ASAP. It starts to get weird if you wait too long. You don’t want to be that person who doesn’t know your next door neighbor’s name after the fifteenth time you’ve seen them! It’s okay to forget once or twice, this is a busy time for everyone. But if you find yourself blanking on the names of people you should know, jot them down so you’re less likely to forget!
Don’t expect everyone you meet to be your BFF. The first few weeks of school, you’ll probably end up in at least one random group of ‘friends’ that eats together at the dining hall regularly, or always shows up to the same table at the library. Maybe these people really are your platonic soulmates, and you’ll all be best friends for life! But it’s more likely that you’re just close because they’re the only people you know. Don’t be afraid to pursue friendships that feel more meaningful than convenient. And don’t be offended if someone does the same with you! That’s what these first few weeks are for.
Do join lots of new activities. Team captains and club presidents know the flake rate is high in the first few weeks of the semester. That’s why they tend to hold big introductory events. These give you a chance to vet groups that will be a good fit, and quit the ones that won’t. So overbook yourself with teams, clubs, and social groups now. Then, narrow it down to your favorites over the next few weeks. (Also, introductory meetings have free food a lot. Enjoy that.)
I’ve written a complete guide to finding the clubs, teams, and groups you’ll love during your freshman year – check it out!
Don’t join just because your new BFFs do. If you have no interest in something, just pass on it. Even if all your floormates are going. This is especially true for Greek groups like frats and sororities! I know a lot of people who love their Greek families and can’t imagine their college lives without them. But I know just as many who got caught up in the glamour of rush, only to realize they didn’t really want to be part of the Greek life. (Or worse, realized after the fact that they couldn’t afford it.) If you’re thinking about joining a frat, sorority, or anything else, don’t let me scare you off – just be sure it’s what you want to do.
Do check in with old friends. Some of your closest friends are probably off at other colleges! College is definitely a time for making new friends. But that doesn’t mean you have to completely forget your old ones. Schedule a night or afternoon where one or two or more of you can get in a Skype call and catch up – but keep it to one night, so you’re all focused on your new schools.
Don’t be embarrassed about homesickness. Even if you’ve been away from home before, college is decidedly different and scary. Your family probably misses you, too, so stay in contact with them as best you can. Do you need to call your mom before bed every night? Maybe not. But if it helps you cope with this huge life transition, no shame! Just keep your focus on your life at school – your goal is to get comfortable there, not escape back to familiar places.
Classes
Do cherish your syllabus. Each syllabus is like a Bible for that class – it tells you what you need to know, what you need to do, and when you need to do it. Keep yours in a place that’s equal parts safe and easy to access. And take a picture on your phone as a backup, just in case. Sure, you’ll probably be able to ask someone if you lose yours, but it’s better if you don’t have to ask.
I’ve written extensively about how to use your syllabus here.
Don’t go overboard. You’ll be getting a lot of handouts and papers this first week. They’re important, but you don’t have to carry all of them around at all times, or your bag will start to spiral out of control. Be judicious about what you carry around, or you’ll find yourself overwhelmed.
Do make class buddies as soon as possible. Find someone who’s sitting near you in class and seems reasonably normal and engaged with class materials. Exchange phone numbers or friend each other on Facebook. That way, if one of you misses class or loses an assignment prompt, you have someone to contact as a lifeline. Next time you have this class, make another class buddy.
Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. The first week of classes is a tumultuous time. If you only get friendly with one other person in your class, and they later drop or turn out to be a bit of a slacker, you’re out of luck. Make nice with a few people. Pro tip? Target people who sit in the front few rows, on the same side of the room as the instructor. They’re most likely to be attentive students. (That said, don’t exploit these people. Actually go to class and take notes whenever possible!)
Do go to class. Especially for small, discussion-based classes, you can give a really bad impression by skipping the first class or two. The first day is pretty boring, in most cases, but it also gives you an overview of the whole class. This will help you decide if the class will be a good fit, or if you need to start adjusting your schedule.
Don’t hesitate to drop or replace classes that don’t work. Obviously, if something is required for your major, you should tough it out. But if you get a bad gut feeling early on about an elective or required class you have multiple options for, don’t hesitate to email your advisor about switching. It’s much easier to change classes in the first week or two than it is to wait until later in the semester. Much like clubs, classes tend to shift a lot early on, so your professor or TA won’t be offended if you switch out!
Do get organized early on. My go-to system was three- or five-subject notebooks that I rotated depending on the day. I had a Monday-Wednesday-Friday notebook for my MWF classes, and a Tuesday-Thursday notebook with subjects for my TTh classes. The notebook subject dividers usually had pockets where I could carry important documents (like my syllabus) and transport new ones (like assignment prompts). This system worked great for me – find one that works for you as early as possible!
Don’t be afraid to change it up. As I said above, multi-subject notebooks were perfect for me. I discovered this by carrying around an accordion file and absolutely failing to use it. If you start organizing your notes and assignments one way and find it isn’t working, switch it up. It’s better to spend $15 on new school supplies than it is to lose an important assignment or page of notes – trust me on that one.
Dorm Life
Do add some personality to your room. Most dorms are Soviet-era blocks of cement and drywall. Your sterile surroundings might make you miserable, if you aren’t careful. Most colleges hold a poster sale during the first week or two of classes – there’s no shame in some quintessential college décor like an Audrey Hepburn poster, string lights, or a tapestry. Go for whatever you like, just make sure it’s damage-free.
Don’t start a goddamn fire. I helped freshmen move into their dorms a few times. Do you know how many stupid, fire-starting things I had to ask parents to leave in the car? So many. George Foreman grills caked in grease, electric heaters with exposed heating wires, a suspicious amount of incense, an entire box of Bath & Body Works 3-wick candles… The list goes on. And really, it’s not about burning the whole building down. If you bring something into your dorm that emits smoke, you will probably trigger the sprinkler system. This will soak everything that everyone owns in old water. That’s a bad way to make friends. (This goes double for smoking anything recreationally – and no matter how careful you are, yes, your neighbors can smell it.)
Do lay down ground rules with your roommate(s). Even if you’re living with an old friend, you need to be clear about boundaries and rules. How late can you leave lights on? When do you need to wear headphones? If one of you is being messy, loud, or bothersome, how can the other address it respectfully? With midterms, finals, internships, and all manner of other stresses coming your way over the next year, you and your roommate(s) need to be able to talk about tough topics under pressure without losing your cool.
Don’t snub your lame RA. Most dorms will have a Resident Assistant, or similar position. This older student lives in the dorms and is your go-to resource for roommate conflicts, residence hall questions, and general homesickness. This is also the person responsible for writing you up, should the need arise. I’m not saying you should bribe or suck up to your RA. I’m just saying you have nothing to lose by having a friendly one-on-one relationship with them.
Do leverage campus amenities. Living on-campus has some serious perks. Learn how much food you can take from the dining hall without getting yelled at. Find the best study nooks your residence hall has to offer. If your building has a library, computer lab, laundry room, or other useful amenities, get familiar with them. Better yet, pay attention to when they’re busy, so you know when to do laundry without waiting, or the best time to print your paper.
Don’t be a jerk about things. Yes, you did find three open washers, and maybe you could finish all your laundry at once… but it’s kind of rude to fill them all at once. If someone asks you to share your study table, try to accommodate them. If your neighbor knocks on your door and asks you to keep it down, do your best. Dorms are crowded spaces, and you need to be decent to your fellow residents if you don’t want to make life miserable for everyone involved.
One Last Bonus
Do try. At everything. Try to do well in your classes, try to work hard at your job, try to have a great time at your parties, try to call your mom every once in a while, try clubs you’re not sure you’ll stick with. I’m not saying you have to be a tryhard overachiever, but college can encourage a certain level of apathy in the name of being cool. Don’t let it sap your passion. Try stuff.
Don’t wear your keys on a lanyard around your neck. By all means, put your keys (and maybe your student ID) on a lanyard. But do not proceed to wear that lanyard around your neck. I don’t know why every freshman does this, and I don’t know why everyone stops as soon as they’re sophomores. But nothing makes you look more like a freshman stereotype than wearing your keys on a lanyard around your neck. Just put them in your pocket, for Christ’s sake.
Why is the lanyard a big deal? I don’t know. But it is. Just take my word for it.
Congrats, you’re now prepared for your first week!
Former college freshmen, what do’s and don’ts have I left out? Future college freshmen, what are you most worried about in your first week?
Headed into college? This first semester checklist might be helpful!
